"Some kind of fictional wonderland"

I have actually read quite a few books this summer, which has been lovely, interesting, and enlightening.  Two of them are written by Daniel Gottlieb, PhD.  Letters to Sam and The Wisdom of Sam.  Both of them talk about how to face challenges, Sam's autism and Gottlieb's quadriplegia.  I did a lot of crying reading Letters to Sam, but have found great insight in both books.

Here is a blurb 

background:  Sam was at a park and got swinging too hard on the swing.  His mom asked him to stop several times and got worried that he'd fall off.  When she finally got his attention she asked him to look at her as she spoke.  When she finished explaining why he needed to slow down, Sam said, "Mommy, I don't know that face."  Gottlieb explains that Buddhists call this, "Beginner's mind."  Sam didn't understand her face - he is a beginner at interpreting how people feel - and he felt okay about admitting that. 

Gottlieb says,

When it comes to reading expressions, I suspect we're all, indeed, somewhere on the spectrum.  We do fairly well guessing emotions when we see a truly happy face.  We do less well with a happy face that hides a sad face, or an indifferent expression that conceals anxiety, or an angry face that is really fear in disguise.  But when we don't know what a face means, do we have beginner's mind, or do we tell ourselves stories?

Most of us grown-ups are in the latter category.  We tell ourselves that we know what the other person is feeling, even thinking.  Even though we are sometimes right, these are mostly just stories.  And then we believe the stories, and those stories lead to other stories, and before we know it, we are off in some kind of fictional wonderland. 

Sam and most other children have something precious that we have lost.  They are comfortable with their own ignorance, so they don't need to make up stories.  They have beginner's minds because they are beginners!

So they have the ablility to teach us a precious lesson:  the gift of looking into someone's eyes and asking what that face means.  They are too young to make up stories.  And more importantly, they are quite comfortable asking.

I love the sentence, ". . . . those stories lead to other stories, and before we know it, we are off in some kind of fictional wonderland."  I often find myself in "fictional wonderland" and could relate to that.